Dealing with Problem People
1 Thessalonians 5:14‑15
For a number or months we have been studying Paul's first letter the Thessalonian church. This morning we find our text in chapter 5 of 1 Thessalonians verses 14 and 15 and I would invite you to turn to that text in your Bible.
Henry Ward Beecher once said, "The church is not a gallery for the exhibition of eminent Christians, but a school for the education of imperfect ones."
He's right. The church is not a place for perfect people, it's a hospital for people who know they're ill. We don't claim for a moment that the church is perfect. In fact, we would eagerly claim that it is not. Charles Morrison wrote, "The Christian church is a society of sinners." In fact, he said, "It is the only society in the world membership in which is based upon the single qualification that the candidate shall be unworthy of membership."
The church is full of problems because it's full of problem people because everybody in it is a sinner, albeit saved by grace but nonetheless with unredeemed human flesh, consequently battling with sin. The church grows in direct proportion spiritually to how well it deals with the sin within it. The process of church growth then is the process of the elimination of transgression, the elimination of iniquity, the elimination of sin. If the church is to move ahead powerfully and be all that God wants it to be, then it has to be dealing with its own internal sin. The world has yet to see what an absolutely pure, holy church would do. The closest thing to it would be the early church. In the fire and the heat in the purity of its birth came an energy that perhaps has been unequalled in the subsequent history. Church growth from the spiritual standpoint, which is the only standpoint God has any concern about, is in direct proportion to how well we deal with the failures in our midst.
Paul wants to help us to do that by giving us these two verses in our text which we'll look at in a few moments. But if we were to sort of step back and take a look at the church and say, "Well, how could we categorize the problem people in the church?" We might come up with five categories...five categories of problem people that retard the growth and the power of the church.
Group number one we'll call the wayward...the wayward. They're never in step. They're always out of sync. They're always out of line. They're never with the program. When everybody else is moving ahead, they're going backwards. When everybody else is filling up the ranks in proper order, they're outside that somewhere, failing to do their duty, not particularly interested in serving, sometimes not at all interested in giving, idle, perhaps even loafing. They're in the way of the progress, disorderly they might be, even AWOL they might be, apathetic they might be, sometimes contentious, sometimes rebellious. And I suppose they fill up the spectrum all the way from apathy to rebellion. They're the wayward, they're just never going the way everybody is going in the proper line. They're at odds with everything.
A second group we might identify that hinder the growth and the life and the power of the church we'll call the worried...the worried. This group is basically motivated by fear. These are the people in the church who have no courage, who will articulate, you know, the famous words, "We've never done it that way before." Who can give you ten reasons why you can't do anything you propose to do, they have no sense of adventure. They hate change. They love tradition. They fear the unknown. They want no risk. They worry about everything. All the issues of life are far more than they can bear. They're usually sad, always worried, sometimes in despair, often depressed, discouraged and defeated. They carry none of the zeal, the joy, the thrill, the exuberance that adventure brings.
We could probably identify a third group, we could call them the weak...the weak. They're just spiritually and morally weak. Christians who because of their weak faith, because of the weak disciplines of their life are susceptible to sin and they fall into the same sins over and over and you barely get them up and dust them off and they're back in the same hole again. They find it very hard to do God's will consistently. They embarrass themselves. They embarrass the church. They embarrass the Lord. They take an awful lot of attention. They test how good a church is at church discipline and usually run you all the way to at least step two.
If we were to identify a fourth group, we could call them the wearisome...the wearisome. Another word for that would be frustrating, but it doesn't start with "W". These are the wearisome, the foot‑draggers. They're in line but they're just going at the wrong speed. They never catch up. You keep teaching them and you keep training them and you keep discipling them and you pour all of this energy into them and every time you look around to see how close they might be, they look like they're farther away. Everything distracts them. They have a great difficulty concentrating, great difficulty focusing. They're just very exasperating because you make the maximum effort and you get the minimum return. They don't move and grow at the pace that would be considered normal.
Finally, group five would be the outright wicked...the wicked. They do evil. Christians who do evil. They commit sins against other Christians right in the church. They break up marriages. They defile daughters. They steal. They gossip. They slander. They falsely accuse. They're just wicked.
Now you understand as the church endeavors to grow it's got to deal with these five groups...the wayward, the worried, the weak, the wearisome and the wicked. And no wonder growing healthy flock is such a challenging enterprise because all these folks need healing spiritually. The wayward need to get back in line. The worried need to have a stronger courage and faith and boldness and confidence. The weak need to be more disciplined in the matter of holy living. And the wearisome need to get up to speed. And the wicked need to do righteously. There's a lot of work to do to bring all these in line.
Now with all that's being said and all that's being written about church growth, all the sophisticated data, all the homogeneity principles, all the cultural demographics, all the subtle strategies, all the entertainment methods, all the advertising technique that are supposed to be the keys to building the church and growing the church...precious little is being said about how to grow a healthy flock spiritually into Christ's likeness by eliminating these problems.
The Bible never says anything about homogeneity. The Bible never says anything about cultural demographics. The Bible never says anything about subtle strategies. The Bible never says anything about entertainment methodology. The Bible never says anything about advertising technique. But it does say if you want to grow a church you need to get the impediments out of the way, you need to deal with whatever is retarding that church's growth. And then when it gets pure and it gets holy, it will get moving and it will know the power of God and it will make a massive impact on its culture.
The Apostle Paul understood this. And if you turn to the Apostle Paul to learn the principles of church growth, first of all what you want to find out is what is his goal...what's he after? What does he want the church to become? Bigger, wealthier, more popular, more accepted in the community? Let's find out what he wanted for the church. Go back to chapter 1 of 1 Thessalonians. This church will be a model and an example of what he would have desired for any church. "We give thanks to God always for you all...he says...making mention of you in our prayers." He was very thankful for this church...very thankful.
Now what was it that caused him to be thankful? Down at the end of chapter 2 he says, "You're our glory and our joy." Over at the end of chapter 5, "Greet all the brethren with a holy kiss," verse 26. He's got a strong affection for this group. Well that's because they were on the way to the right goal. They were shooting at the right target.
I look at all these church‑growth experts that come along and all I can think about is David going out to fight Goliath. And Saul comes along and gives David his armor. And you remember what it says in 1 Samuel 17:39? It says of David, "He tried in vain to go, for he was not used to it. Then David said to Saul, I can't go with these, I'm not used to them. I can't wear this stuff. I'm not used to it. So David took it all off, went out, took his slingshot, he was used to that, that was the end of Goliath." The only way the local church is ever going to kill the Goliaths is to do what it's used to doing, to do what it's mandated, taught, trained and developed to do. And there are always going to be the Sauls in the wings who want to load their armor on the little Davids. But we're much better off with the weapons we know how to use.
Now Paul was very clear about the goal of ministry, chapter 2, look at verse 10. Let's begin to get a feel about what he was looking at in terms of church development, church growth. "You are witnesses, 2:10, and so is God how devoutly and uprightly and blamelessly we behaved toward you believers, just as you know how we were exhorting and encouraging and imploring each one of you as a father would his own children." All right, you're really working at it but what are you trying to do? "So that you may walk in a manner worthy of the God who calls you into His own kingdom and glory." My goal for you is that you walk worthy of the God who called you.
Go down to chapter 3 verse 1. "Therefore when we could endure it no longer, we thought it best to be left behind at Athens alone and we sent Timothy our brother and God's fellow worker in the gospel of Christ." He said, "Now I couldn't stand it anymore, I couldn't stand not knowing how you were doing and not seeing spiritual progress, so even though it meant me being alone in Athens, I sent Timothy." By the way, Silas also departed from Macedonia. "I sent Timothy...he says...my worker in the gospel to strengthen and encourage you as to your faith so that no man may be disturbed by these afflictions." They were under persecution. "For you yourselves know that we have been destined for this, for indeed when we were with you we kept telling you in advance that we were going to suffer affliction, and so it come to pass as you know. For this reason, when I could endure it no longer I also sent to find out about your faith, for fear that the tempter might have tempted you and our labor should be in vain."
He was concerned about them walking worthy. He was concerned about them having a strong and developing faith. He was concerned about them being able to handle persecution and difficulty. Down in verse 8, he says, "We really live if you stand firm in the Lord." He was concerned about their spiritual strengths. Verse 10 he says, "Night and day we keep praying most earnestly that we may see your face." Why? "To complete what is lacking in your faith." You see, what he wanted was a strong mature faith, that was the goal of his prayers and his efforts. That's what he was after. He says, "Now in this great benediction may our God and Father Himself and Jesus our Lord direct our way to you, may the Lord cause you to increase and abound in love for one another." We want you to love each other more. "And for all men, just as we also do for you, so that He may establish your hearts unblameable in holiness before our God and Father." See, he's after faith and love and virtue.
Chapter 4 verse 1, "Finally then, brethren, we request and exhort you in the Lord Jesus that as you received from us instruction as how you ought to walk and please God, just as you actually do walk, that you may excel still more." We want you to walk worthy. We want you to please God.
At the end of verse 10, "We urge you, brethren, to excel still more." And there he's talking about your love. And then in verse 11, "To lead a quiet and peaceable life, attending to your own business, working with your hands just as we commanded you." In chapter 5 verse 11 he says, "Encourage one another, build up one another, just as you also are doing." And then that benediction in chapter 5 verse 23, "May the God of peace Himself sanctify you entirely and may your spirit and soul and body be preserved complete without blame at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ."
Boy, pretty clear in his mind what church growth meant to him. He was after deepening strengthening of the lives of believers, knowing full well that as you...as you eliminate the impediment presented by the folks that are retarding the church, the church begins to move in power. So Paul put his major energy, his resources, his prayer and his passion into growing a healthy spiritual flock by transforming the wayward, the worried, the weak, the wearisome and the wicked into the righteous and powerful and effective. And when the effort was successful, as it was in Thessalonica, he rejoiced.
Now go back to chapter 1 again. He rejoiced. Verse 3, he says, "I constantly bear in mind your work of faith, and labor of love and steadfastness of hope." And in verse 6 he says, "You became imitators of us, you became imitators of the Lord." Verse 7, "You became an example to all the believers in Macedonia and Achaia." Verse 8, "The Word of the Lord echoed from you throughout Macedonia and Achaia and in every place your faith toward God has gone forth." Everybody knows you've turned from idols to serve the living God. Everybody knows you're waiting for His Son from heaven. You've done a tremendous job in evangelizing, in demonstrating your faith. What joy he got out of that.
Chapter 2 and verse 13, "For this reason we constantly thank God that when you received from us the Word of God's message you accepted it not as the word of men but for what it really is, the Word of God which also performs its work in you who believe. For you, brethren, became imitators of the churches of God in Christ Jesus that are in Judea. You also endured the same sufferings at the hands of your own countrymen, even as they did from the Jews." Another commendation. They were real. They were true. They were faithful. They were firm. They endured suffering. And he's so joyous over this. And that's why he says in verses 19 and 20, "You're my joy, you're my joy," he says it twice.
In chapter 3 and verse 6, "Now that Timothy has come...he says...from you and brought us good news of your faith and your love and that you always think kindly of us, longing to see us just as we also long to see you, for this reason, brethren, in all our distress and affliction we were comforted about you through your faith. And we really live if you stand firm."
You see, there was so much joy when the church was growing and the church was progressing. And he even said, "I don't have to talk to you about love cause you're taught by God to love and you're doing it. All I can say is do it more." He comes in to chapter 4 and verse 9 and that's where he affirms their great love.
So, you see, when you're ministering in a church that's growing and progressing and faith is being strengthened and it's strong enough to handle persecution and it's walking worthy of the God who called it and it's walking in holiness, endeavoring to be blameless at the coming of Jesus Christ and love is flourishing and love is growing, it's exhilarating and it's joyous. A healthy flock is a beloved flock and Paul loved these people dearly. He couldn't resist them.
But that is not to say...that is not to say that they didn't have any problems. They did. And if you look at our text, verses 14 and 15, you will meet the problem people. Verse 14, "And we urge you, brethren, admonish the unruly, encourage the faint‑hearted, help the weak, be patient with all men, see that no one repays another with evil for evil but always seek after that which is good for one another and for all men."
That's a marvelous, marvelous duet of verses because even though the church at Thessalonica was flourishing and growing, they had problems. And whatever they weren't was a result of those problem people. All five groups were there, just like all five groups are here. And by the way, if you're looking around to see who is near you and what group they might fit in, at one time or another we're all in one or another of these groups. But Paul said in 2 Corinthians 11:28, "It's the care of all the churches that is the biggest burden of the ministry. It transcends any physical pain I have endured," he says. "On top of all the pain, the whips, the rods that have bashed my body is this concern for the churches."
Colossians 2:1, "I want you to know how great a struggle I have on your behalf." To put it in the vernacular, "You are a big pain to me." This is a burden to me, carrying around on my back all the churches that need to grow.
Now in these two verses as he defines these five groups, he also tells us how to deal with them. This is in a section which we've entitled, "Growing a healthy flock." Verses 12 and 13, which we've already studied, talked about the relation of the shepherds to the sheep and the relation of the sheep to the shepherds. Verses 16 and following talk about the relation of the sheep to the Great Shepherd. And our text talks about the relationship of the sheep to the sheep. So this little section covers it all.
In verses 12 and 13 he talked to the shepherds as to how they were to treat the sheep and he told the shepherds, "Labor among the sheep, take authority over the sheep, and instruct the sheep." He told the sheep how to treat the shepherds. He said to the sheep, "Appreciate the shepherds, esteem the shepherds and submit to the shepherds." Starting in verse 16 he's going to tell the sheep how to relate to the Great Shepherd, "Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks, don't quench the Spirit," and so forth.
But right now he's talking to the sheep about how to deal with the sheep. The key word then in verse 14 is the word "brethren." While certainly there is a responsibility on the part of the shepherds to exercise unique authority in confronting these five groups of troublesome Christians, the lines between the shepherd and the sheep in this regard are very fluid. He uses the word "brethren," and just to give you a comparative note, verse 12, "We request of you, brethren, that you appreciate those who diligently labor among you, have charge over you in the Lord and give you instruction." Appreciate your shepherds. So brethren in verse 12 is directed at the congregation, we assume therefore that brethren in verse 14 is also directed at the congregation. He's talking to the sheep about how they deal with the other sheep. It does not exempt those of us in leadership, but it includes everybody. And by the way, you note also Romans 12:14 to 17 is a very close parallel to this text and it obviously is directed at the whole congregation.
He also notes that there's an urgency. We urge you, he uses that familiar Greek verb parakaleo to come alongside someone and help them. It has a tone of urgency in it. So he is urgently, zealously, eagerly encouraging the sheep to get involved in helping the sheep that need the help. You see, church is not showing up on Sunday morning patting yourself on the back about how deeply religious you are. Being truly involved in the church goes far beyond the audience mentality and attendance. It gets all the way down into involving yourselves with these five groups of people that are retarding the development of the church and therefore its ultimate impact.
Let's begin with the wayward...group one, the wayward. Verse 14, Paul writes, "And we urge you, brethren, admonish the unruly." Now that little phrase "admonish the unruly" introduces us to the wayward. The word ataktos often was used in a military sense. When used in a military sense it had the idea of a soldier who was out of line, a soldier who was out of rank, a soldier who was guilty of disorderly conduct, who was insubordinate, non‑submissive, disobeying orders, not following through on his duty. He was out of step. It eventually came to mean anybody who doesn't do his duty, anybody who doesn't follow through on his responsibility. Moffit(?) translates it "loafers." Some have suggested quitters, idle, lazy, indolent, apathetic. But it doesn't have to mean just that. It can mean someone who doesn't do his duty not only out of apathy, but someone who doesn't do his duty out of a rebellion.
In 2 Thessalonians where some cognate forms of this word are used, this word is used only here in the New Testament, but where some other forms of it are used in 2 Thessalonians 3 verses 6, 7 and I think 11, in that particular text it is used to refer to some lazy busybodies who don't work and expect everybody else to do all the work and take care of them. For us, it refers to the wayward. They're out of line. They're out of step. Everybody is going in one direction, they're not. Everybody else understands spiritual duty, is willing to do it, do whatever God has gifted them to do, get involved in the service, whether it means that I'm serving the Lord with my gifts, I'm giving as God has prospered me, I'm behind the leadership of the church, I'm supporting the direction we're going, I'm on board, I'm on the team, I'm participating, I'm a part, I'm involved. That's the kind of person that makes the church move and grow. These are the kind of people who reject all that. They're out of step. It may be that they're not doing their duty because they don't care, it may be that they're not doing their duty because they're angry and rebellious and contentious. They're just not supportive. They're not a part of what's going on. Sometimes they hang on the fringe for a while and finally they are so bitter they just leave and go somewhere else. They're the bench warmers.
And I learned a few things when I was in athletics. One of them is bench warmers become critics. The people who do the most criticizing are the people who fail to do their duty. I can remember sitting on the bench through a football season. And I had the privilege of being a starting running back and there were a few others that didn't start because I did. And at first they would be somewhat encouraging to me, thinking they were going to get their moment. And when their moment wasn't coming, then they would be secretly wishing I would break my leg. And when I didn't break my leg, they would then begin to take it out on the idiocy of the coach who didn't know talent when he saw it. And eventually they would root for the other team. That's the progression.
People who resist involvement, who never want to get beyond the audience mentality, either for apathy sake or for rebellion sake, they come to hear, to watch, and then to just criticize, perhaps at worst, do nothing at best. One preacher said, "Usually they sit in the back," but I wouldn't want to say that. But I would say that sometimes you can watch a person who becomes critical systematically move back. So I'm watching you. If you're going back two or three rows a week, I know what's happening. This is a culpable laziness. The people who want to sort of just hang on the fringe out there, just on the edge. They don't want to get involved too much. They don't want to have any accountability. They really don't want to get into it. They don't want to become a part of it. They're just not in step. That's intolerable conduct in a growing church.
How are we to deal with it? Very simple, admonish them. There's no formula, there's no program, there's no system. Individual sheep go to these sheep that are hanging on the fringes and not doing their duty, not using their gifts, not ministering, not on board, not supportive, not with the program, not going the way everybody is going. They're out of line, out of rank, disorderly, AWOL and just coming alongside. A.T. Robertson said, "The verb noutheteo means to put sense into." To come alongside and put some sense into their heads. One writer says, "It is the idea of coming to someone who is following a path that ultimately ends in serious consequences and instructing them about the inevitability of those consequences."
In other words, the word can be translated to warn someone.&nb